Naked at the Vatican
Aaaaaaaaand we're back! I can't remember everything that has happened in the past few days, but they've been pretty eventful.
Soooo, after I finished blogging on Tuesday, I went to the library here to get some information for my seven page paper due on Thursday. Well, really it had to be finished by 6:00 on Wednesday because that would be the last chance I had to print it out before it would have to be turned in at 9:00 AM the next morning. I go home and start to get some information organized with page numbers and stuff written down. I planned on pulling an all-nighter and going to sleep sometime after I finished typing the paper since I wouldn't have class on Wednesday (to be explained in the Wednesday section). Well, I get almost all of my information organized by about midnight but yet to write a single word, so I decide it's time for a short break. I go and chill with Matt, Kristen, Micara, and Shawn (the last three being UW girls). Well, they are on the list at a club (yes, a REAL club, not the same old bars that we usually go to -- with a VIP list and everything), and they try to persuade me to come. I, being the boo-tay shakin' slacker that I am, decide to go. We take a taxi to Piazza del Popolo, then walk to the Tiber river where the club was supposed to be. We go down some of the sketchiest steps I've ever seen to go down to the water level. We walk a little ways and finally see it -- it's a frickin' river boat! How rockin' is that? So we, being on the VIP list, just walk right by everyone in line, and the bouncer lets us on the boat. The music they were playing when we got there was great (oh, it's a hip-hop club, by the way). We go get a drink, scope the place out, find a bathroom for the ladies, then get a table. Not long after that, I'm flat on my back on the dance floor shakin' what my mama gave me. Yet again, all of the Italian men are looking at me like I'm the devil. One guy who was kind of dorky looking with glasses was actually looking at me and taking notes. I was highly amused. I pull a few of my usual moves including the one where I do a jump while turning 180 degrees around. Well, three girls were walking past at the time (all of this according to Matt who I believe was having a better time watching me than I was having shakin' it), and they all look at each other like "oh my god, did you just see that?" while pointing and smiling and stuff. I was sorry that by the time Matt told me about it that they had already gone. Damn. Well, we all shake it for a while until the music got really lame. I'm talking about Eurofake-Rasta music here, not even Bob Marley, so at about 4:00 we walk out of there. Well, this club is WAY away from our apartment. It's past the Vatican and Castel Sant'Angelo. Since there are no taxis near by or buses or other forms of transportation running this time of night, we have to hike it back. Well, somehow the conversation got on how I want to go skinny dipping in a fountain here and Matt wants to go in his Eurotrunk man speedo things he got here. All of a sudden I made my oh-face. No, not the good one -- the one where I inhale a lot of air and involuntarily start flailing, the one where everyone is like "oh no" and proceeds to run far, far away. The idea comes to mind that instead of doing it in Trevi Fountain, which until this time I had considered it the ultimate fountain in Rome, to do it in the fountain in St. Peter's Square at the Vatican. How many people can say they've been skinny dipping at the Vatican...really? It takes almost no convincing to get Matt and Micara in on the plan. Kristen abstains, and Shawn agrees to hold the camera. See, I figured that if I did it, one of two things would happen.
a.) I would go straight to Hell, but since I went skinny dipping in the VATICAN it would be worth it.
OR...
b.) The water in the fountain would work like holy water, so by skinny dipping in it I would have the holiest penis on earth, and everyone would want to touch it.
We make our way to St. Peter's and scope out the place. There entire square is blocked off, but there are only two sets of guards. We're all like "hell frickin' yeah!!!!!" We pick the spot outside of Bernini's colonnade from where we're going to run. We take off our shoes, climb over the barricade, and hide behind one of the columns. We run straight to the closest fountain. On the way I hear one of the guards way far away say something. It wasn't like a screaming, but more of a friendly something. Anyways, that doesn't stop me. We keep on truckin' hit. We are about to swan dive into the fountain when all of a sudden we notice that there is no water whatsoever in the fountain. They drain the fountains at night!!! We actually made it to the fountain, touched it, but no water. Our hearts sank. I know mine was lower than it has ever been -- I was sooooooo disappointed. Never have I ever been as disappointed as I was then. We walk back to our apartments with our heads sagging. Though I guess it was a plus considering we didn't get shot or anything. Well, even that way we probably would have made CNN or something. Though watching the sky change colors as we walked back was really pretty. Once we say our goodnights at a little past 6:00 am (I guess this would qualify more for Wednesday), I decide that I should probably work on my paper some since it has to be finished and printed out in 12 hours. Well, after the quick thought of working on my paper, I decide that I have time for 4 hours of sleep, so I set my alarm for 10:30.
Wednesday....
Okay, the reason I don't have photography class at 9:30 AM is because he moved it to 8:30 PM for night shooting. We're not required to attend this because of class or other conflicts. I would not be able to attend because I would be seeing Il Trovatore by Giuseppe Verdi being performed at the Baths of Caracalla at 9:00. Opera or class? Which one would you pick? Well, being as that I love opera, I picked it. So, I wake up at 10:30, throw on some really bad clothes and a hat (I may have even been pretty smelly at this point, though I'm not sure). I make it to the computer lab at 11:00 and begin working on my paper. I, obviously, have my distractions as the computer is hooked up to the internet and probably only work half of the time I'm there. I print out my finished paper at 5:56 -- BOO-YAH! I rush back to the apartment all the while stripping off my clothes. As soon as I'm naked (naked naked naked!), I jump in the shower really quickly, put on my white suit with my Dolce shirt, do the necessary primping, and head out. On my way there (I walk everywhere) I got a LOT of head turns and honks from cars. The honks that were not directed at me were directed at the two or three cars to tell them to put their eyes on the road and not me. Oh, it was awesome! Getting stares and smiles from the well-dressed Italians because of what one is wearing -- damn right! I get to the baths and make it to my seat which is in the section with some of the other JCU students. I end up being the only guy from JCU there. Darn the luck! :-P Well, this being an open-air event and the setting not even being at an amphitheater, I thought the sound was going to be mediocre at best. Boy was I wrong. The acoustics were spectacular. I couldn't believe how well the sound carried. It was better than many of the concert halls in which I've been. Plus, all of the off-stage singing sounded soooo much better than in a theater. It was really believable. The sets used also complemented and used a lot of the same design techniques as the giganto-enormous Baths of Caracalla behind it (it was set up in what was formerly the garden area of the baths). With the lighting on stage coordinated with the lighting on the building coupled with the great Verdi music and an especially awesome solo from the mezzo playing the gypsy-witch at the end of the second act all while a gentle breeze pervaded over the crowd on a cool summer's eve, I kid you not...I had an orgasm. Sans semen, of course. Most guys don't understand that an orgasm for a man and cumming are totally different things. They don't know what they're missing. Oh gawd, is it hot in here? Anyways, where was I? Oh, so the opera finishes. I totally loved it. It has one of the best and most intricate plots I've seen in an opera. Though I prefer Pucini, Verdi's work is great also. I walk back, still getting looks in my ultra-hot threads. I get back to the apartment at about 1:00 AM and hit they hay immediately in order to get up at 6:00 the next day for class.
Thursday....
So far, I got up, got ready, and went to class. We met on Tiberina Island, then walked to the Baths of Caracalla while seeing the Theater of Marcellus, Temple of Apollo, Temple of Portuna, Temple of Hercules, and the Circus Maximus on the way. The night before I took in the atmosphere of the baths. Today I got to learn about it. I come back, and for the first time since I've been here, I have McDonalds. It was soooo good and greasy...mmmmmm. They also actually had ice in the drinks. Although I was a bit disappointed because of the burger, I swear it was like two-thirds the size of one in the US. And ketchup (called French fries sauce here) costs ten cents extra. Then I came here and blogged.
The End...or is it? *dum dum DAAAAAAAAAAA*
Soooo, after I finished blogging on Tuesday, I went to the library here to get some information for my seven page paper due on Thursday. Well, really it had to be finished by 6:00 on Wednesday because that would be the last chance I had to print it out before it would have to be turned in at 9:00 AM the next morning. I go home and start to get some information organized with page numbers and stuff written down. I planned on pulling an all-nighter and going to sleep sometime after I finished typing the paper since I wouldn't have class on Wednesday (to be explained in the Wednesday section). Well, I get almost all of my information organized by about midnight but yet to write a single word, so I decide it's time for a short break. I go and chill with Matt, Kristen, Micara, and Shawn (the last three being UW girls). Well, they are on the list at a club (yes, a REAL club, not the same old bars that we usually go to -- with a VIP list and everything), and they try to persuade me to come. I, being the boo-tay shakin' slacker that I am, decide to go. We take a taxi to Piazza del Popolo, then walk to the Tiber river where the club was supposed to be. We go down some of the sketchiest steps I've ever seen to go down to the water level. We walk a little ways and finally see it -- it's a frickin' river boat! How rockin' is that? So we, being on the VIP list, just walk right by everyone in line, and the bouncer lets us on the boat. The music they were playing when we got there was great (oh, it's a hip-hop club, by the way). We go get a drink, scope the place out, find a bathroom for the ladies, then get a table. Not long after that, I'm flat on my back on the dance floor shakin' what my mama gave me. Yet again, all of the Italian men are looking at me like I'm the devil. One guy who was kind of dorky looking with glasses was actually looking at me and taking notes. I was highly amused. I pull a few of my usual moves including the one where I do a jump while turning 180 degrees around. Well, three girls were walking past at the time (all of this according to Matt who I believe was having a better time watching me than I was having shakin' it), and they all look at each other like "oh my god, did you just see that?" while pointing and smiling and stuff. I was sorry that by the time Matt told me about it that they had already gone. Damn. Well, we all shake it for a while until the music got really lame. I'm talking about Eurofake-Rasta music here, not even Bob Marley, so at about 4:00 we walk out of there. Well, this club is WAY away from our apartment. It's past the Vatican and Castel Sant'Angelo. Since there are no taxis near by or buses or other forms of transportation running this time of night, we have to hike it back. Well, somehow the conversation got on how I want to go skinny dipping in a fountain here and Matt wants to go in his Eurotrunk man speedo things he got here. All of a sudden I made my oh-face. No, not the good one -- the one where I inhale a lot of air and involuntarily start flailing, the one where everyone is like "oh no" and proceeds to run far, far away. The idea comes to mind that instead of doing it in Trevi Fountain, which until this time I had considered it the ultimate fountain in Rome, to do it in the fountain in St. Peter's Square at the Vatican. How many people can say they've been skinny dipping at the Vatican...really? It takes almost no convincing to get Matt and Micara in on the plan. Kristen abstains, and Shawn agrees to hold the camera. See, I figured that if I did it, one of two things would happen.
a.) I would go straight to Hell, but since I went skinny dipping in the VATICAN it would be worth it.
OR...
b.) The water in the fountain would work like holy water, so by skinny dipping in it I would have the holiest penis on earth, and everyone would want to touch it.
We make our way to St. Peter's and scope out the place. There entire square is blocked off, but there are only two sets of guards. We're all like "hell frickin' yeah!!!!!" We pick the spot outside of Bernini's colonnade from where we're going to run. We take off our shoes, climb over the barricade, and hide behind one of the columns. We run straight to the closest fountain. On the way I hear one of the guards way far away say something. It wasn't like a screaming, but more of a friendly something. Anyways, that doesn't stop me. We keep on truckin' hit. We are about to swan dive into the fountain when all of a sudden we notice that there is no water whatsoever in the fountain. They drain the fountains at night!!! We actually made it to the fountain, touched it, but no water. Our hearts sank. I know mine was lower than it has ever been -- I was sooooooo disappointed. Never have I ever been as disappointed as I was then. We walk back to our apartments with our heads sagging. Though I guess it was a plus considering we didn't get shot or anything. Well, even that way we probably would have made CNN or something. Though watching the sky change colors as we walked back was really pretty. Once we say our goodnights at a little past 6:00 am (I guess this would qualify more for Wednesday), I decide that I should probably work on my paper some since it has to be finished and printed out in 12 hours. Well, after the quick thought of working on my paper, I decide that I have time for 4 hours of sleep, so I set my alarm for 10:30.
Wednesday....
Okay, the reason I don't have photography class at 9:30 AM is because he moved it to 8:30 PM for night shooting. We're not required to attend this because of class or other conflicts. I would not be able to attend because I would be seeing Il Trovatore by Giuseppe Verdi being performed at the Baths of Caracalla at 9:00. Opera or class? Which one would you pick? Well, being as that I love opera, I picked it. So, I wake up at 10:30, throw on some really bad clothes and a hat (I may have even been pretty smelly at this point, though I'm not sure). I make it to the computer lab at 11:00 and begin working on my paper. I, obviously, have my distractions as the computer is hooked up to the internet and probably only work half of the time I'm there. I print out my finished paper at 5:56 -- BOO-YAH! I rush back to the apartment all the while stripping off my clothes. As soon as I'm naked (naked naked naked!), I jump in the shower really quickly, put on my white suit with my Dolce shirt, do the necessary primping, and head out. On my way there (I walk everywhere) I got a LOT of head turns and honks from cars. The honks that were not directed at me were directed at the two or three cars to tell them to put their eyes on the road and not me. Oh, it was awesome! Getting stares and smiles from the well-dressed Italians because of what one is wearing -- damn right! I get to the baths and make it to my seat which is in the section with some of the other JCU students. I end up being the only guy from JCU there. Darn the luck! :-P Well, this being an open-air event and the setting not even being at an amphitheater, I thought the sound was going to be mediocre at best. Boy was I wrong. The acoustics were spectacular. I couldn't believe how well the sound carried. It was better than many of the concert halls in which I've been. Plus, all of the off-stage singing sounded soooo much better than in a theater. It was really believable. The sets used also complemented and used a lot of the same design techniques as the giganto-enormous Baths of Caracalla behind it (it was set up in what was formerly the garden area of the baths). With the lighting on stage coordinated with the lighting on the building coupled with the great Verdi music and an especially awesome solo from the mezzo playing the gypsy-witch at the end of the second act all while a gentle breeze pervaded over the crowd on a cool summer's eve, I kid you not...I had an orgasm. Sans semen, of course. Most guys don't understand that an orgasm for a man and cumming are totally different things. They don't know what they're missing. Oh gawd, is it hot in here? Anyways, where was I? Oh, so the opera finishes. I totally loved it. It has one of the best and most intricate plots I've seen in an opera. Though I prefer Pucini, Verdi's work is great also. I walk back, still getting looks in my ultra-hot threads. I get back to the apartment at about 1:00 AM and hit they hay immediately in order to get up at 6:00 the next day for class.
Thursday....
So far, I got up, got ready, and went to class. We met on Tiberina Island, then walked to the Baths of Caracalla while seeing the Theater of Marcellus, Temple of Apollo, Temple of Portuna, Temple of Hercules, and the Circus Maximus on the way. The night before I took in the atmosphere of the baths. Today I got to learn about it. I come back, and for the first time since I've been here, I have McDonalds. It was soooo good and greasy...mmmmmm. They also actually had ice in the drinks. Although I was a bit disappointed because of the burger, I swear it was like two-thirds the size of one in the US. And ketchup (called French fries sauce here) costs ten cents extra. Then I came here and blogged.
The End...or is it? *dum dum DAAAAAAAAAAA*
posted by QiqJoe at 7:40 AM
5 Comments:
y'all are nasty, and that is just wrong to skinny dip at the Vatican anyway. :-P
Wow, they had ice in the drinks! I'm impressed! (And to all of you (except Kyle), yes I'm serious. Ice is a luxury.)
Hehe, you said "Eurotrunk man speedo things." Funny, Google gives no results with that search.
hey ke-ke, your country is going to disappear in 3 days if you don't check it...
Actually, I put all of my countries on vacation mode which gives them 60 days (or is it 90?) of inactivity, but thanks for the heads up! I totally forgot about them while over here. I knew I would; that's why I put them on vacation mode. But I checked on all of them and logged in and deleted my "Compliance" messages just to have some activity in there. Thanks again!
yay! yeah, you get 60 days to live in vacation mode. I'm glad you're not dead. :-)
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